Lone Wolf

I have been having difficulty motivating myself to do pretty much anything lately.  I spent three weeks in Colorado in August because my Father was very ill.  He died on August 20th, the day after I got back to Ithaca.

It feels odd to miss someone who was not really a part of my daily life.  We talked on the phone about once a month.  We may not have been in touch very often, but we shared common interests.  My favorite memories of him from my childhood are of sitting on the couch together watching Star Trek: TNG.  This began a life-long love of Science Fiction for me.

My Father was like an anchor in my life.  Knowing he was there made me feel safe; the world made sense.  Without him it doesn't.

I feel depressed and unmotivated.  I need to get back to doing the things that need to be done and the things that make life fun.  So, I am treating myself to a ticket to the Whose Line is it Anyway? live show with Colin Mochrie and Brad Sherwood at the State Theater tomorrow night.

Better to Be a Bulldog

Sometimes what I hate most about myself is my strength.  I have to do many things that I really do not want to do.  It would be easy to give up and say "I can't do it."  However, I am too strong for that.  Every time I start to give up I realize that I can do it.

Today I had to restart my weekly injections after a month-long break.  Having a needle phobia has made doing these injections difficult.  I had to stop them tempoarily in order to clear up a sinus infection.  The injections supress my overactive immune system.

I am not entirely happy to say that I did my injection despite almost having a panic attack.  At least it is over for another week.  It wasn't even that bad.  There is just something about metal piercing my skin that gives the heebie-jeebies.

Thanks for reading,
Bulldog Bitsy

Yay! The internet is back! My internet was out for about 24 hours. I've been waiting all that time to tell everyone about my new rats!!!!!!!!!!!! I spent the weekend in Buffalo adopting three beautiful little rats. Although, when Amy saw them she said they are ROUSes, not rats. Curly is an albino, also called a Pink-Eyed White. He came to the rescue place with a couple of mates called Larry and Moe. Logan and Gambit came in together. I think the former owner was a fan of the X-Men. Logan is a hooded rat, which means that his body is white and his head is a lovely bluish-grey. Gambit is a siamese rat. He is mainly a buff cream color, but has a cute brownish-grey stripe on his nose and a ring around the base of his tail. I am going to rename Gambit because the name doesn't fit a sweet shy rat like him. I am going to call him Sammael; he's my little angel. Logan is extremely adventurous. He's always the first of them to explore any new thing they encounter. Curly loves to cuddle and be petted. Sam seems to be most interested in me personally. He spent a great deal of time sniffing me the first time I held him.

Squeak!? The R.O.U.S.'es arrive.

I spent the weekend in Buffalo visiting with friends and picking up my new pet rats. Sometimes I am more of a rat than a puppy. I am intelligent, curious and I like to hide. Rats are great! They are so friendly and sweet. I adopted three rats: Curly, Logan and Gambit. I'm renaming Gambit to Sammael or Sam because he's my little angel. Sam is way too sweet and meek for a name like Gambit. I love him. Curly is an albino or PEW (pink-eyed white) and loves to cuddle and be petted. Since his eyesight isn't great, Curly is easily startled. I have to be careful when picking him up, and the other rats startle him sometimes too. Sam is a sweetie. He seems most interested in me personally. He has sniffed my head all over while sitting on my shoulder. He stuck his nose in my ears (Just like Eddie, my previous rat.) He was also the first of the three to lick me. Logan is going to be a handful. He is adventurous! He is the first to investigate anything new they encounter. He is also eager to explore outside their cage, which could be problematic. Logan is the alpha rat. They are all male. It is really easy to tell because male rats have huge testicles. I spent my New Year's Eve bonding with the ratties and rearranging their cage in an attempt to end some squabbles between Logan and Curly. It seems to have worked. As I write this, they are doing secret ratty things in the dark. Rats need a period of darkness each day; I'm not sure why. They sleep in the morning and early afternoon. More about the rats soon.

Canine Literati

I recently discovered a new author. Christopher Moore has written many silly books. I started with You Suck, a vampire novel with a fantastic title. After only a couple of chapters I realized that it is a sequel. So, I had to get the first book, Bloodsucking Fiends. I was startled when I found the original even funnier than the sequel. I know it often works that way, but the sequel was so funny that I couldn't think of it as less funny than something else. I highly recommend the books to all dogs with refined literary tastes. These two books even have a couple of fun canine characters.

Eddie RIP

I'm starting to really miss having a pet. My rat Eddie, who died last year, was a joy. I loved it when he sat on my shoulder and stuck his nose in my ear. His whiskers were wonderfully tickly. He already had pneumonia when he moved in with me. My fiance said I could run a hospice service for rats because I spent so much time with the little fuzzy guy while I had him. I have begun at long last to seriously consider getting a couple of young rats to roam about the house. Rats are so inquisitive and friendly. I've always thought that rats are terribly cute. Anytime they are represented as icky or creepy on TV or in movies, I always have an, "Oh! Cute!!" reaction.

Bunnies Bite

Cute, hungry rabbits ate my tarragon plant. They left nothing but a few inch-long stems sticking out of the ground. I don't mind being a rabbit farmer. We have a warren somewhere near our house, whose residents are getting more and more cheeky by the day. I'd go out and bark at them like any reasonable puppy, if they weren't so darn cute. The wildlife in Upstate New York is amazing. I've taken up birdwatching at the suggestion of my shrink. I'm finding it terribly exciting. I am slowly putting up photos on Shutterfly from some of my cool bird sightings. After hearing about a million stories about squirrels hogging birdfeeders, I decided to put up a separate feeder for squirrels. I got some great photos of what I can only call squirrel acrobatics. Check them out at ...

http://bitsy5.shutterfly.com/

Sorry, I didn't have this working right before. It should be working now.